Wednesday, January 13, 2010

It's here!

2010 is here!

The year that I talked about in so many previous posts has arrived. And it seems, somehow, to be flying by. I don't know how, but we're already half way through the first month. And, for me, that means one thing - my first official trip out to Colorado for "pre-season assessment."

This trip has provoked a roller coaster of emotions.  First, (back in December) I was SCARED, but with good reason, as I have been fighting with a rotator issue for a good two months now. The pain was bad enough to make me stop running (yes, that bad) for a good 6 weeks, in an effort to let it heal. When that wasn't happening, I began to get anxious, angry, discouraged... you name it. Every negative emotion that could creep into my head, was. And, in the back of my head, the clock was ticking. I knew I had/have very BIG goals for this year and I need each and every week of workouts to be effective in getting me closer to the level of competition I dream of being at.

I already blew coach's plan of starting the pre-season with a swim-run block (changed to swim/bike). But I fought with myself daily to make the most of the swim and bike sessions I was assigned. Like I said, the negativity was (self-induced, yes, but) a major challenge. I just wanted to feel GOOD! And RUN!

I am proud to announce, I made it through the running hiatus, it is now officially 2010, and feel GREAT today - after my second day of 10 + mile workouts!--- running, yes!

Now, don't get me wrong. I didn't go from 6 weeks of zero to 10 miles and more in a day (or even a week). And the loss of running fitness, from that break, was noticeable and alarming at first (another bout of negativity).

But getting back to this past week of a little "build" and a lot more running... I'm on a high.

My hands are in the air and I'm smiling ear to ear on this roller coaster.

Tomorrow I might be screaming and scared again (on my way down), because as excited as I am about going out west and hanging out with Coach for the weekend ;) , I'm scared too. I want my effort to show, I want to be able to hang in workouts with some very talented athletes out there, but I'm afraid that I won't. I know that I am not at my best right now (in terms of fitness). I also know that most triathletes, at this point in the season, aren't either. It could be detrimental, in fact, if they were. We need to be at our best in 4 months from now and maintain that ultra-high level for the 4-5 months after that. It is unknown (to me) where I should be right now. How fit, is fit enough? Where do I need to be right now? The unknown, to me, is the scariest.

But my goal right now, is to not let fear get the best of me. Rather I will use it to motivate me. It will be the crank, or the engine (not sure about the mechanics of a rollercoaster, haha) that gets me back to the top of the peak and smiling again. Ready to throw myself into a new (possibly scary) challenge.

And knowing the valley will always be there, I'll use them and the lessons learned down there to power me back up.

Cheers to what's bound to be a fun ride - 2010!

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